BITCHEZ BURGERZ! MAPLE, BACON, PULLED PORK BURGER!

Valentines is such a fucking bitch, everyone moaning or being disgustingly happy! A couple of years back I got my heart well and truly broken by some absolute loser who didn't deserve my tears; it was Valentines day and quite frankly I wanted to suffocate myself under a duvet, but my beautiful friend Hannah Clark rang me up, told me to put my best dress on, sacked off her boyfriend and took me for a slap up meal at the Hilton. It was honestly the loveliest thing that someone has ever done for me and absolutely meant the world. It was that though that made me make my vow, valentines is for my bitches, the people who really wont ever let me down, will always dry my tears and hold my hand. So this valentines I decided to woo the ones I love with a tower of meat! I introduce "Bitchez Burgerz"!!!

Ingredients

Maple Syrup

Bacon

Burger Buns

Burgers

Pulled Pork

Onions

Lettuce

Tomatoes

Onion Rings

Gherkins

Cheese

BBQ Sauce

First, buy a joint of pork, slow roast until looking slutty, then cover in BBQ sauce, slow roast for another 30 mins. Then buy beef and make burgerz! You can also buy pre made burgerz, look, I’m not gonna judge as long as you eat ALL the meat. Grill. Cook your bacon, grill or fry, I honestly don’t care. Then build. BUILD. BUILD. BUILD. Make sure it has every bitching thing on there, including those dirty onion rings. Serve with fries. This is one to make the bitches cry. Oh meat, you are my sanctuary! If your heart hurts call 911 or alternatively call burger king. 

I love you ladies & men xxxx

A burger poem....